She tried to have sex with him but he quote unquote respected her
standing in the yard with no pants on waiting for google maps to come and take a picture.
she went to her friend's wedding and caught the bouquet. as the unwilling rebound, can i run away now?
My cock is literally on the edge of falling off. Fuck Vegas.
you looked at her and told her she looks like the girl you lost your virginity to then told her you wanted to lose it to her again
I'm on the struggle bus
just ordered a number 1 at a fast food restaurant that doesn't have numbers
Now I'm heckling that my belch is more exciting than their fireworks and I peed down the driveway.
I could not actually bring myself to utter the phrase "donkey cock" in front of my father. Not possible.
We split an eighth of shrooms and went ice fishing. It didn't get weird until I caught one and we both started crying.
If there was a build-a-penis, I would build that penis.
He's so in love with you that you could fuck a blood relative and he'd be like "I just want you to be happy"
she's p upset bro
Where is he. I have a sword.
Seltzer and cocaine. Life is flawless right now.
she glued two packs of googly eyes on you while you were blacked out. We talked her out of using her hot glue gun.
ummmm thanks
Always great to be boarding a plane when you realize that what you thought was gas is actually very untrustworthy
Randomize
