This girl is very crazy
She's one of those compassionate ppl
So everything I said on this seemingly endless date offended her
You're the only chick there. That's not an orgy, that's called a gang bang...
i sold my breathalizer so i could buy weed
Word to the wise: learn how to ask "What is my bail posted as" in French before traveling abroad.
Taking jello shots out of a big bowl from a measuring spoon. holla atcha boy.
When she can manipulate the direction of her leg hair, you know its time to leave
It's chlamydia! Thank God!
And then like 10 minutes later they were taking a bath together. HOW DOES HE DO IT.
WHY AM I ALWAYS DEFEATED BY THE LATIN COCK?!?!
Alright. I will breast feed the first person to get here.
I'm pretty sure at any given moment you could wring out my liver and get a couple of shots of jäger.
But I REALLY want to hide my crazy for as long as possible with him so he'll date me.
sweet sixteen by hillary duff just came on and i feel like i let lizzie mcguire down for being such a stoner
On another note I never thought having a drug addicted stalker would prove useful
Just got home, my brothers stoned and he got a high score on COD.. He just asked me if I wanted to have a celebrational yogurt with him. Wtf?
Randomize
