coke and sex party at dan's
im watching greys anatomy with megan...
wha-pishhh
I'm convinced that Kathy Griffin and Andy Dick are the same person...
The crowning achievement of my weekend was hooking up with someone I'm at least facebook friends with.
of course! give me a few hours to recover from chugging a 4loko out of a frisbee, and it will be rage time yet again
That is true. Vodka is like a dog. Always loyal, warm, and there for you when you need it
I'm covered in mustard and it looks like I nose dived in to barbed wire ??? Was last night that good?
Well, no one has ever described you as a perfectly balanced individual
You never know how much you love your bed until you sleep with 4 other people in your car.
we got her to the bathroom intime. all she could say was 'now my bladder is empty just like my soul'
its the first football sunday and my boyfriend isn't excited. this isn't gonna last unless he makes me snacks and brings me beer during the game.
Mcnellies. I'm drunk enough that you have a window. Capitalize.
So I have been told that I licked your eyebrows last night
I was the oldest, shortest, and soberest at the New Years party last night. My life sucks
oh and i figured out why we kept smelling vomit. ive got vomit on my socks. putting the heater on my feet was not the best of ideas.
When have you ever know me to go too far?
Besides the alcoholism, the HR issues, and getting fired from Best Buy for tackling a display?
Yeah. Besides those.
Randomize
