Wow, you were right... Weed does start conversations
I just rolled a joint with a page from On The Road by Kerouac. I have never felt like more of a hipster.
He choked me out. i woke up to poo. I dont think i like S&M
We saw a kid playing in poison ivy. We walked away, he'll learn his lesson.
Well she just peed in a pot and is now trying to boil it
We were making condiment sandwiches, then her husband kept trying to get me to sleep with her. I hate being the only lesbian at the party.
I'm pretty sure I told everyone in the bar I hadn't had sex in five months. And then I offered everyone calamari.
My life hurts
I woke up 30 minutes away from the bar, my car was at a train station, and when I got home all I got was the speechless head shake
Actually here it's more "lie around naked in a dark room" weather.
I'm not breaking up with him because his husky is having puppies.
She made me a smoothie in the morning.. It was vodka and fruit.
I apparently got up in the middle of the night after fucking him and started looking for you under piles of his clothing
Tempting guys with beer and cheese. How Midwestern are we?
I just have to decide what I love more, food or dick.
Damn him and his beautiful face and body and penis.
Randomize
