After 4 hours of foreplay he passed out and almost immediately peed in my bed. Naked. Like a fountain. Then tried to deny it in the morning by saying he just sweats a lot.
I'm cheering for the colts this year. I basically have to since my fake says i'm from indianapolis
hey girl hope you're alright, you hit that tree really hard. have a good night.
1. my parents still have sex. 2. being a screamer runs in the family. 3. so much so that i can tell what number of orgasms she's on. 4.so looks like i'm stuck outside a while
only you would end up drunk at a subway with a one-eyed homeless man
The one wearing a viking helmet and holding a bottle of Smirnoff. She's laying on the floor of the tube singing "cant find my way home" . You can't miss her..
If for no other reason than to cuddle with that puppy, you have to hook up with him again.
I had to convince someone last night that the fact that he couldn't get me off wasn't him it was me and to clarify I had to tell him there was only. One person that got me off every time without fail, he said "that guy is my hero" you should be proud
I think I'm goin to jail but either way I had a blast.
I hope Team Snapchat has been enjoying our sex snaps all this week.
His encouragement of my recreational drug use is the backbone of our nonrelationship. That, and rough animal sex and loud music.
You told the bartender at least five times that you were naming your son "Jagermeister" but you would use the bartender's name "Fernando" as his middle name. You were drunk.
What. The. Fuck.
You'll have to be more specific. I do a lot of "what the fuck" kind of stuff
NOT PREGNANT HIGH FIVE!
sorry i was ignoring you last night i accidentally did a bunch of pcp and thought i was inside tron
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