Done. Eyebrows are waxed, entire body shaved
I'm totally gay for Miss Californiaaaaaa
oh sweet, sweet irony
The guy I fucked in the port a poty just called me and asked me on a date!
Awkward!
No he was cute and I said yes!
Being a girl sucks.
Being a boyfriend sucks for about a week, too
That bus ride was like a tour of all the bushes I puked behind last night
She is sleeping in a dress because she's too drunk to put "real clothes" on
The tent neighbors already set us on fire w an errant roach. How do you think Bonnaroo's going?!
Hurricane Earl: Get Blown party at my house friday! Byob: bring your own bitch/booze. Must have 80s blown hair style, kazoo/noise maker (vuvuzelas/airhorns are allowed), and/or bubble wands. \n
Why am I even shocked you're doing this....
I really hope our interview with channel 6 last night doesn't air or else my parents are gona get a first hand look at my alcohol problem
Dont ask, hes out back rolling around in the yard freaking out. literally just had a 15 minute conversation, only word i could make out was "yellow"
Well, thats the first guy to go to jail because of my vagina
Post that event on your timeline
He did leave his bud tall boy and 2 choco tacos, so not a total loss.
Lock the bathroom door next time you are going to masterbate with the shower head, okay?
I was just power-washing my vagina.
Hope you are okay. You were running down the street with shopping cart at one point and yelling "bitches aint shit!"
Girls - I think I have a problem with stealing random shit when I'm drunk.
Randomize
