I Bought a bracelet with bible characters and a charm broke. the virgin mary one. Do you think it's a sign?
i just woke up in the woods behind my house in handcuffs and a dan marino jersey ive never seen before
Half Baked? Au contraire, Ben and Jerry, I was fully baked when I ate that whole pint of ice cream.
my facebook is like a giant collection of my one night stands
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm watching the red sox through my neighbors window from my bathroom. We're winning btw.
$5 long island pitchers = roommate pissing on his laptop at 3am.
You kicked in the door when she was blowing him. You dont remember do you?
You said that "grilled cheese was much to complex" and started to throw the buttered bread at the wall while eating all the cheese.
eh, I feel I'm heading for a breakdown and I need to get it out of the way before I start writing that lab report.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Being hungover in this office is the actual worst. Like they look at me and know I was wasted at 1 am, karaokeing Billy Idol at a gay bar.
I gave three different guys a boner at the same time last night, and none of them are in the same city as I am. That's achievement.
I couldn't read the menu. I ordered the first thing I was able to read. Don't think I ate anything. Left $20 on the table.
Only real friends lend their restraints to engagedfriends to fool around with married strangers.
My boss asked me to pass over one of my business cards and instead I had condoms fall out of my wallet, how’s your day going??
is it still considered wake n bake if you wake up at 2 pm?
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