McDonalds has hash browns for only a quarter!....how many u want?
All of them
she had a my little ponys comforter. i left when she went to the bathroom
Hemmingway ran to paris to avoid going to the university of illinois and becoming a doctor. It was there he developed a drinking problem. I need a plane ticket.
At dinner I grabbed his hand and he screamed "mom she just grabbed my penis" the proceeded to shove my hand down his pants! Hello Mr.Dick!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We've finally come to the understanding that as long as our conversation stays stricaly sexual, we get along.
I have 11 glasses of water and one beer on the table infront of me. Have to keep going to different bartends to get more. There are only two though and I think they've caught on
That's fun. I just masturbated and I swear my vagina creaked.
There was a dismembered bleeding penis in my dream last night. That's some serious Freudian shit.
You had salsa out and brought a banana on a plate to bed
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
BTW, you ever shave a dick into my dog, I'll cut you. I'll laugh first, but then I'll cut you
I'm going through a really dark time right now
I don't want to hear it man. I just jerked it to a pic of my ex wife in a bikini. Buck up
I actually had to tell him that sex doesn't replace my Tupperware. Our relationship has reached a weird level.
Look,the guy had sex w/a Canadian prison guard on the deck of a cruise ship,he could blow any second.
I just want to sing to him and rub baby oil on his head
It's barely past noon, how am I already talking about double penetration
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