you wouldn't even come home last night... Dead to me
what happened last night??
everyone saw ******'s vagina
and that's just the beginning
dude we were spooning naked in bed with her ass in my crotch. she sharted in her sleep all over my dick.
Just discovered Kim Possible porn. Life is now complete.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You've picked up chicks by quoting metal bands
When they're drunk they believe it's Shakespeare...enjoy the simple things
at which point I apparently ran in and shouted "I made the sex with that one!"
This went bad. Everyone is crying, i dont know why and I am really uncomfortable.
do you think you could subtly ask him about the dimensions of his penis?
The worst part was I wasn't conscious enough to move out of the way, I knew i was being puked on but I couldn't move.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
found out that hot proper business chick in my class A) did a bar crawl last 2 night and still showed up to class and B) is 19 and C) so not as proper as I thought D) is single. How the fuck does that work? Freaking superwoman.
So, I'm playing the Doctor Who drinking game with my dogs, but they don't understand quite when to drink. Still counts as successful, though, right?
Dudes don't just lick butts of chicks they're not into.
I was so ripped I had a natty light box over my head carrying a spray bottle out in the streets trying to give car washes.
Your vagina needs to teach my vagina its ways.
I just realized. I havent even gotten a paycheck from this new job yet and already laid one of the girls most of the dudes are after
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