just come out here and I will go home with you...
I mean, he's dancing back and forth between pathetically sad and massively fucking creepy.
drinking steel reserve before noon and watching the price is right... 211... bet i pass out before then.
drunk pissing on my closed toilet lid is actually quite a sobering experience
He's playing farmville on his phone while puking over the toilet..
I dont think yelling "Grab your dicks, time for pics!" helped your case either.
Pretty much gone. He was in the backseat and kept whispering that his "toes felt like pigtails"
How did you make it to work sans hangover?
4 words: Clif Bar soaked in tequila. Just like albert pujols
I GOT A VENDING MACHINE FOR OUR LIVING ROOM
She rode an inflatable shark down the stairs. Viva shark week.
Just woke up from a weed coma and found a stem in my bra. Rainy day success.
Paris has not been good for her. Everytime she has a one night stand from a different country, she buys a mini flag and tapes it to her wall with the others
I have no idea what happened last night, but my pee is neon green.
I'm fine w planning around your penis prospecting. Saturday it is.
Do you think I could use my teacher of month Award to get free drinks?
Randomize
