That arnold schwarzeneger picture looks strikingly similar to paul
Not half as good looking as paul
I'd say paul has bigger bicep peaks, but who am I to judge
he held my hand while i was giving him head. freud's gotta be turning over in his grave
he is literally lying on the floor eating cookies. doing nothing. and as i was hitting him he needed to protect the cookies more than himself.
I'm drinking bacardi out of her mom's eco-green starbucks mug and chasing it with her sister's "for track only" vitamin water. Hello suburbia
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We've had the 'life would be so much better if we were both lesbians' conversation too much for that to be okay.
I have to stop drunkenly making out with guys just because they're tall or have a beard.
He told me to fuck off at some point in the night. I think it was right before he jumped out of a moving car trying to get to another bar and made Abby cry.
I have no idea where I am, where my pants are, there is cheese stuck to my ass.. Why do I have your phone?
shot for shot with some guy twice your age to prove Detroit hustles harder then you left with him. We're tracking you
We both got free alcohol and got laid by foreign men last night.
I'm not going out again for the rest of my life. I can't top this.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
turns out putting a tie on my unicorn onesie didn't make it acceptable "formal wear" and I found salsa in my cup holder
The only good thing about the sex was that he finally cracked the spot on my back that's been hurting.
Is it too much to ask for 10 minutes of privacy while I masturbate?
I thought he was hot. You know, in a “I’ve gone batshit insane and want blood for the blood god” sort of way.
I was just told that I'm the Sherlock Holmes of drunken sex. I'll take it.
It's like a donut of clothes around a pair of heels. Like they were transported to another dimension naked.
Randomize