thus making me awesome and them whores
it's not our fault the pink and the sink are so close together.
2 v-cards in one night. impossible is nothing.
Did they have a limo or was i just stoned?
Thats gotta be it. Also just found out that the fireworks will fit in the airsoft pistols...we are all gonna die
I'm not surprised. You have the libido of an Italian soccer team.
Like I had to call my dad because I couldn't manage to unlock the door. And when he got there to open it I was climbing the gate to get in.
So I think my aunt and her one legged boyfriend are getting it on in the next room. Traumatized does not even begin to describe what I am right now
Does buying my brother condoms for Christmas say "keep having sex with her, I like her" or "dear god, do not get this girl pregnant"?
I'd feel bad about being drunk at the Christmas service, except for the fact that I've already had sex in this church, so this is just small change.
I almost died today via plastic wrap. I AM THE REASON THEY PUT WARNING LABELS ON THINGS.
I smelled him yesterday and almost relapsed he's like cocaine
Being in the club with your moms drunk friends > having a healthy relationship with your mom
One day he'll find out I do drugs and stop talking to me.
What will you do then?
Drugs, probably.
the last thing is remember is that strange guy in the leotard...i woke up in my bed, naked, with a half eaten grilled cheese on my nightstand, a six pack in the fridge, a new pack of cigarettes on my pillow and coke in my purse. apparently i bought some drugs, shopped and cooked. typical.
Randomize
