So A**** bought my story about how my hickey was a bruise from wrestling
on one hand i'm glad that i'm not in trouble...on the other hand i realized that the reason i cheat on her is because she is so stupid
I just put a condom on my dildo so i wouldng get another uti....most depresIng moment of.my LIFE
Haha oh wow he'd be perfect. He's got everything MTV looks for in a real world cast member. Gay. Tool. From Methuen
I was about to go down on her and her dong flopped out and hit me in the chin. This may have a Nam like post-traumatic-stress-disorder effect on me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i would bitch about being this hungover, but honestly im just happy to be alive after this weekend
On the bright side since it was a Tuesday you weren't even in jail for the long! that could've been worse!
You blinded her by spitting vodka in her eyes, the vodka you had just taken as a body shot off of her.
My stomach is revolting cause i have put food in it and no alcohol.
Girl please we both know I eat his bullshit up like its candy sprinkled with crack
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
my brain is opting to stay half drunk rather than relearn how to think. the rest of me is in no position to argue.
I have to stop letting him stay all weekend. I feel like a cored apple.
You yelled "Everybody!!! Round of applause to Jill for not doing anal!!" Right in front of him.
I need to pull it together. I just cried my eyes out to Master Chef Junior.
I just googled, "what type of cured meat does my face taste like", and one of the top results was, "The Definitive Guide to Bacon." I couldn't make this up if I tried.
Bra is off & I'm snuggled in a pizza. Adulting is good.
Randomize