Dude, I just had an awesome rave/orgy with like bunch of hot Asian chicks on a cable car. It was like being in a Gwen Stefani video, cept w/o the bad spelling
God, I love San Francisco.
So one buddy got tackled at the urinals by national guard members and was arrested. Another had sex in a port o potty with possibly the drunkest girl I've ever encountered. The rest of us blacked out and won a few bets. So yes, the derby did meet our expectations.
I have three paper towels stuck up my vagina. This is not a time to be calm.
They sext over her pic comments. Role playing as wolves.
I'm on my way, but at some point we're going to have to settle who gave who crabs the last time
Either I put my underwear on inside out and wore it like that all day, or I had sex with him. Its sad I have to guess.
I rode a bull tonight, There is absolutely no reason my dick is not in some chicks mouth
Home safe. Took me everything not to stop and pick up some random cat that looked like an ocelot tho.
You were pouring Patron into the window of the squad car trying to get the police dog to drink it
So thats why that cop beat my ass?
Probably
I don't see how I managed to fuck up so much shit in an hour and a half..
Everyone is speaking Spanish and this 300 hundred pound chick is talking about the time she got out of prison... Fuck this place
I had jack at 8 am= instant drunk
I haven't showered. And am sitting in the office smelling like a beer can someone's been using as an ash tray.
Lessons learned from last night: do not leave me drunk and alone with strippers and a credit card. Let's do whatever's cheaper.
HER BOYFRIEND CAME HOME WHILE WE WERE GETTING IT ON IN THE SHOWER
At least you smelled nice while he kicked your ass.
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