What are we going to do tonight?
What we try to do every night. Take over the world
WE WERE REALLY IN A PORNO LAST NIGHT
you were on all fours yelling at the earth to stop spinning.
Stop trying to talk to my friends!!
then get some ugly ones...
Dude I broke my bong in half this morning. I kicked it as I was jerking off. I would never hide anything from you.
I snorted a few ambien and woke up here. A lady banged on our door, waking us up, demanding our towels.
Right now he's sitting in the chair pointing to me to go away. He's trying to have quiet time with his penis.
Update: That guy is no longer in the restroom, so he's probably not dead.
I have a boner in one of my pics with her which no one noticed.
There were 7 of us cowering in the kitchen because you were swinging a giant, pink double headed dildo around like a nunchuk and hitting anyone who came near you with it.
I just gargled with NyQuil
If he sends me a dick pic so help me god.
We were making out on the floor and his 13 year old beagle crawled in between us & just sat there...I got cockblocked by an ancient beagle named Bubba
He was like the most intimidating looking guy you've seen in your life except he was really shittily doing the two step
We just started our own DARE program: Drugs are really enjoyable.
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