i'm sending her a home depot gift card for the hole i put in her wall. call it good?
He must be back home now. He moved his box of beer from her porch to ours.
I have just two goals for this NYE. 1) get so drunk that every guy looks like Clive Owen 2) make out with as many Clive's as possible.
She looks like a junkie muppet...awful
The first couple times was just weird, but after last night, I'm beginning to think you have a real problem banging pregnant women who are carrying someone elses child.
I actually took a sword out of your hands. You were samurai slashing lemons to make chasers.
If you want me to retract my crazy cat lady comments pictures of yourself dressed as a cat are not the way to do it.
So help my penis see only you. Give him some attention as well.
Circle jerk is a real thing. It looks like five innocent virgins in a closet at my brother's bar mitzvah. Yeah, I walked in on that.
haha it's ok, I asked people. I was like "I'm high and lost" and the dude just said "That's my life. Love it."
I've been here 11 months and i just realized i have literally never looked at my apartment/roomates sober
I just started the bonfire using a tampon. Who knew they could have multiple uses?
It feels like I was drinking gasoline last night.
Omg cinnamon bun Oreos. Thanks weed
Please don't think I'm weird for texting you this at 12:08 am but I just found another picture on the Internet where I think you can see his dick through whatever he's wearing
Randomize
