i just saw an asian skipping down the street and it made me think of you
Is it bad to use cherry nyquil as substitute for grenadine? Because i just went there.
Nah, totally cool. It already has the alcohol in it.
corn on the cob and anal lube are not substitutes for the real thing
When you gave me the first bj i thought 'yep, this girl is going to do great things with her life'
He told me he was 'pondering the natural wonder that is my ass'
Like, dude. I'm already fucking you, you don't need to wax poetic.
Isn't he wasted enough that he might actually mean it and not just be trying to get you to fuck him without a condom?
he said I could live with him because I'm cheaper than a dog and don't need a pet deposit. That and I don't piss on the carpet...
When his Irish accent comes out my uterus hums. Or some productive organ down there, I'm not sure of the logistics
i'm going to invent a mini fridge that can hang from faucets so i don't have to get out of the bathtub anymore for a cold beer. its a million dollar idea
Ed's in which sucks about a thousand cocks... But thats 1800 less than working with Alex so it's gonna be a good day
Walk back down Church toward Mass Ave. Take a right and head for the guy in a kilt on top of the really tall unicycle. C u soon!
I have bad memories with every alcohol but we manage to work through the problems for the good of the relationship
What do you mean not that crazy? I had sex last night. with my\nBOSS. in the restaurant where we WORK.... ON A DINNER TABLE.
For future reference: bathtub full of cheeseburgers = win.
beach body workouts will consist of dancing and cocaine, and sugar free redbull
Someone should walk up to them and say, "We're sorry, you're too hot to be out here with the other humans."
Randomize