I think I know how big ted kennedy's penis is.
There are the 2 BIGGEST tools by me-- at our table. I hate them. But they're not ugly and I may make out with them later. And hate myself. Definitely hate myself.
the only plus side is that now I'll be able to tell my son not to trust the condoms that his college gives away..........
The sun is out and the snow is finally starting to melt here... Vodka bottles keep popping up everywhere. Guess it's the college version of burying nuts for the winter
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i just shit on the floor of my room. my roommate was in the bathroom, my choices were limited.
My sister got her picture in the pub crawl section of the paper today and my dad said to me "why can't you be more like her?"
will you please explain to me as to why or how i have a dirtbike tread looking bruise on my back?
Just a smidgen more estrogen and shed be golden
She's got a legit dose of dude going on
No kidding. All she needs is a cheek full of chewing tobacco and I'd have fucked John wayne.
He tells me he loves me and I say I just want him for sex, then he looks at me like I just said I hate puppies. What kind of guy is he?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
we found him passed out on the baseball field with two 40oz and wearing a tophat.
Where did he get the tophat?
Just had a med school interview with that doctor I fucked in college. He remembered. Asked if I still have my nipple rings. Overall, I think it went well.
I just choked eating whip cream from the can, and peed a little because I was coughing so hard. How am I still single.
I've got five complains from the landlord about she being too loud during sex in two weeks I'm marrying her
I'm trying to secure Christmas dick. Idgaf if he has strep or not.
Your heart isn't making stupid decisions... your penis is outsmarting your brain. Stop fucking her!
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