Beverly Hills, 90210. Cleveland Browns, 0.
you started puking right when a nickelback song came on..it was epic
just put a funnel in my mouth and pour the tequila in with a little emergen-c
You stole her bday cake and shared it with drunk strangers on the street.
Don't make me out to be the bad guy. You practically MADE me cum on your food.
reaaaally cool. my cat ate my birth control.
Wheres my "thanks for using birth control effectively and not contributing to the downfall of society" card.
She just texted me that she's horny, then started quoted random music, then telling me everything she regrets. I don't think there's enough tequila in the world for me to deal with her...
Been in bed for 16 hours. Haven't eaten in 18 hours. Haven't pissed in almost 20 hours. Fuck you Stacey and your former reign as laziest bitch. I got the title now.
Lets start a coed nudist frat/sorority. It would be amazing. Or just an orgy club. It would also be amazing
Last I saw, they went for a smoke and only one came back. He passed out outside. I'm glad he's only 120lbs. I left him on the rug still. My mom is gonna be pissed.
We decided to keep having sex while I ordered the pizza. I wanted extra pepperoooooooooooooni.
You just get me
I'm the wind beneath your wings, bitch
Fucking adderall I just talked at the security guard for 90 minutes
I plan on getting so intoxicated, that I think it's MY own birthday
Can I play this game?
Randomize
