idk why but i just wanna to have sex with the idea of him. i don't even wanna meet him.
mmmm my 21st bday fucking sucks all my best friends are pregnant...selfish assholes. they just couldnt wait til after my bday.
Eating in charleston sc at a seafood place called "hymans". Like normal I had no problem finding it.
just threw up nine times in the shower.. solid night last night.
you wouldn't come out from under your bed because you said there were six-armed bears everywhere.
ohhh that explains the pepperonis I found in my sock drawer this morning...
no it doesn't.
Just checked my recent transactions online. Between the hours of 1 and 3am on September 30th, I went to 7/11 4 times. Unacceptable.
He poured the shots. We did them together. I cheersd him out of the shower
I feel like today should be a " im going to have sex with you cause its raining and theres nothing else to do" kinda day
So then I proceeded to the kitchen to make my "specialty," which consisted of a frozen veggie burger topped with peanut butter. I guess he ate it too.
He looks like he's going to feed me a taco and then stab me. It's probably a good idea he's a lawyer
I hurt so much. Not in the emotional way, but in the I went to dive bars sorta way.
my spring break was before theirs and i literally fed him vodka all week, only stopping for class and bowls. like handles. i cant even think anymore, that chastity belt was hard to get off,
I got frustrated so I just stood up and said take me to bed or lose me forever and banged the first guy who responded show me the way home. Thank you Top Gun.
i left you alone for two hours TWO HOURS & when i got back i had to rush you to the hospital because you were covered in Smooth Away pads & drinking the bong water..
I woke up and there was a tiny sombrero on my penis. Care to explain?
Randomize
