i wonder if i could find a boyfriend who would call me big papa
sure if you go to prison
You probably shouldn't be hiding under someones bed listening to them get head
just throwing this out there: period starts tomorrow sooo either sex tonight or not until tues/weds.
i get a bj anyways so it's really your choice.
k i'll be over in 5.
Hey sis... Don't forget moms day is this sun. And don't get her another gift while you are freakin high this time. The vibrator was embarrassing.
FYI the vibrator was a SUCCESS. She was in a much better mood this last year. Maybe you should get high this time and get a great gift
this study room smells like vodka
the study room thinks the same about you
I just made a steamroller out of a christmas ornament. I feel so festive.
I have their Unicorn picture in my shirt, and I just threw a Bud Light Platinum bottle through their window. We need to go now.
i feel like there is just so much pressure to sex him up, its like the weight of the world is on my vagina.
You've never even broken a bone. You singlehandedly disprove natural selection
There is a dude in a thong with a Nerf axe having battles in the street. Welcome to Portland
I call BS on that! THAT WAS TOTALLY AN INTERCEPTION. JENNINGS HAD THAT.
PEOPLE ARE FLIPPING FURNITURE HERE. IN THE ROOM ABOVE ME. I HEARD SOMEONE WOOKIE CALL IN ANGER FROM SOMEWHERE IN THIS BUILDING.
I'd be lying if I said I wasn't scared, even a little.
His dick is hereby named Charles Dickens. Will's is less cerebral. I'd like to call it Pinnacle like the vodka we drank when we hooked up, but I feel like that's a compliment it doesn't deserve.
I believe I can fly has to be one of the most inspirational songs of our time. Seriously R. Kelly nailed it
Then he went and peed on those teenagers.
I would recommend NOT getting ass enhancement shots.
Long story short, I found someone who takes me seriously when I say I have a Shakespeare kink.
Randomize
