Saw a guy smoking a cig holding it with a fork and driving WTF?
Don't really want to talk about it. You were right. She had a whole jar of toenail clippings on her nightstand that she chews on "when her fingernails are too short." Direct quote.
I am at a striph cluv. They are ovealls everywhere. I have hot rock botto.
girls just need to accept the fact that i'm going to make out with their boyfriends
At what point in time did you think it was ok to jizz in my hair while I slept??
Around the time you told me my brothers dick was bigger.
we were boning in the bathroom when her boyfriend came upstairs. I wish i could remember what happened next more clearly, because it had to have been hilarious
Don't blame me for eating all the ham.. I gave it out to people, so at most I'm guilty of ham distribution
Hindsight is 20/20. Or a bladder infection.
Itll be like a collage of penis. And not that abstract, one penis in a big painting contemporary shit. Collage....
While all the other girls were trying to out skut the next, Cameron was just doing cartwheels around the bar. I think she's the only one who got laid.
2 men making out for 2 seconds to trick a cop so they don't get arrested for being pulled over rolling a blunt is not gay.
I want you to read this conversation tomorrow and be proud of the fact that you taught me how to decipher any drunk message. Good job.
I put purple lights under my bed and asked him if he wanted to fuck in a spaceship.
Don't date the locals. They're all tainted.
He updated Facebook... "Got a new phone today." WHAT ABOUT THE FUCKING KID YOU HAD?!
Randomize
