so last night after we hooked up i got my period and woke up this morning with a blood stain on his bed and not only was it huge but i had put my jeans back on before bed so i took the walk of shame with period stained pants
It was worth having to clean the cum stains out of the carpet.
man, work is way more interesting with these acid flashbacks.
Yeah kinda weird. My grandparents are here for dinner and I'm chilling on the couch close to tripping out on pain killers. My pap asked me how works going and I prettymuch drooled on myself as an answer.
He's cute when he's drunk, too. Also he tried to fight my door...
You told me "I need to pound this drinks if I'm going to pretend his dick is big enough" then left. Dollar night quotes 2012
What are your plans?
Get picked up. Convince you to leave work. Smoke. Drink. Fly helicopters.
I'm so high. Midnight pancake breakfast in bed
I am about five seconds from ripping off my clothes and throwing myself into the ocean to become a mermaid
I don't understand why you're so excited, it's my vagina not yours.
She said "we just have chemistry" ... I wanted to say "no, you just have a vagina."
I have aggressive nipples.
Fire trucks are here again. It wasn't me this time.
Maybe why that's why I'm perpetually single... I can't find a guy with bigger balls than mine.
You were crying hysterically
So that's why my heels were in the oven...
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