my drunken desire to be gossip girl continues to ruin friendships for me
"Worlds Wildest Videos" should be called "Crazy White People"
this dieting is killing me...just started drooling watching a dog food commercial
dude i doubt hes gay
I CAUGHT HIM BEATING OFF TO MENS HEALTH!
You can't use the, "think about your future" line when trying to convince me to save some weed for tomorrow.
Have you ever wondered what your stripper song would be?
Her bed looked like it had just hosted a water balloon fight. It was that good.
I dont think he was a real cab driver. I think he was just a creepy guy with a van.
I will also take that commission in the form of weed. Pass that on to the asst. manager.
i've been hiding in the laundry chute for like thirty minutes from her. not my manliest moment. but dude this is awesome
I call it a party but only because that sounds better than 8 people getting drunk around a pool.
Last time we had an ultimatum like that, things went very far south. I'm down, but it's your turn to wake up in a hospital.
STONER SAFETY TIP: don't use the driver's side vanity mirror to check how red your eyes are while you're driving. it won't work. trust me.
He was singing R-E-S-P-E-C-T to a stripper between motorboats while our HR manager cheered him on.
- I'm finally learning to be functional when I'm high. I feel like this is a milestone.
Randomize
