He still wants to giggity, regardless of his girlfriend. So...I guess I'm happy again.
Is it gay to rub my penis between my butt cheeks and pretend that they're tits?
Wow! You need to get laid.
please stop telling ppl youre Alice Cullen when youre drunk
HAH. HARRY POTTER CASUAL CONVO HAS BEEN EXTENDED TO DISCUSSING WEATHER. SO PRO
People were stuck in the elevator screaming and freaking out. I banged on the door and yelled, "fire depart!" They got excited and then I ran away. lolz
he was so nervous about his first time.. it was like michael j. fox trying to put on a condom...
I didnt believe in cockblocking untill my roomate brought home that.
I never thought your mom would see me throwing up on my hands and knees in your front yard
Are they engaged or just dating? Girlfriends come and go but the memory of sex at the pool last forever.
I just bought the ATT family protection plan so that I could block all of my old bar hookups from booty calling me...
My time here is complete. I think I have now thrown up in every major degree programs building
Will the fact that I have 4 boob hickies add to or take away from tonight's outfit?
lesson #1 of freshman year: grinding with a sombrero is difficult
Is it really bad that my last patient offered to fuck my brains out if I gave her IV morphine...and I gave her my phone number and told her when my shift is over?
If there was a bread and water delivery truck id make sweet hungover love with it.
Randomize
