he made me stop in the middle of the blowjob to turn the tv towrds him. i then proceeded when he stopped me again to get him the remote. fuck me.
My Yahoo Answers account was suspended. Apparently I answered "I like chicks who do anal" to over 100 questions last night.
I found my laptop, credit card, and a bottle of Morgan all on the counter this morning. I'm scared to see what gets delivered to my house this week.
I just got a Community College debit card in the mail. My failure has been materialized.
I wish I still had pics from the prostitute I paid/dated
Just coerced a Santa to buy me a handle. Tis the season.
from the looks of the bare footprints in the snow it looks like i was dancing in circles which explains the frozen puke
I feel like i could break down a fucking wall with this boner
Soooo, coming over soon?
Sorry I pissed in your dining room and kicked your best friend in the face while he was passed out.
You sent me a picture of you holding a goat then asked me if I would have day sex
Your stoned with a 2 year old in the room....and that makes you want to have babies?!
Had sex in a cemetery last night during a thunderstorm. I feel like my goth points have skyrocketed
I feel like there is something fundamentally wrong with me as a woman. My initial text to you was "What's up, fuck bucket?"
I woke up in a bunk bed beside two Brazilians dude you have no idea how happy I was
You tipped the Uber driver extra for taking your phone away while you were drunk texting
Randomize
