if you dont talk to me in person you cant text me
Remember that time I came into your room after taking a muscle relaxant and we argued about what state has the longest coastline?
i keep forgetting that not all of my female friends are bisexual.
someone just puked in the library. they put up caution tape. i totally underestimated finals week.
Either I'm losing my touch or ED is running rampant in 20 something men now
Man, I wish they all looked like that. Your vagina deserves to have a nice frame around it, and God's signature at the bottom.
All I want is to send a text that says "i slept with someone while wearing nothing but purple argyle socks this weekend." But the only person i would send that to is you. But you already know. Because they were your socks.
Tommarow we shall sacrifice the freshmen to the sun god
Teenager with grandparents staying in their room: is to blue balls, as parent waiting for teen to come home safe: is to sleep. You will live- love mom
sent a snap of my boobs out to my FWB his response was what happened to your other nipple ring.. how do I say it got ripped out by my other FWB last week without sounding like a slut
I curse you to think about Guy Fieri whenever you have sex with your lady.
I ended up changing her contact in my phone to "O Great Potato".
He called out my ex's name during sex.
Alex is a pretty common unisex name.
It was the same Alex. I asked.
God does not give you boobs that amazing to not share them with your friends
Etiquette question... How do you tell your mother that her nipple is out in her fb profile picture?
Randomize
