I just found out I have a small penis.
Couldn't you tell by how you've NEVER had a girlfriend?
I guess calling a coworker a lesbian sea cow is some kind of violation.
Last day of classes. 1st day attending every class. I'm proud of myself
Your TV has the DVD menu for White Chicks permanently burned into the screen. I can't anymore. That's just a whole different level that I cannot comprehend.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he put listerine on his cock to make the taste more "enjoyable"... i think hes a keeper.
she tried giving me head in the pool. it was more entertaining than pleasurable
all i asked was if it was all the way in, and now im laying here alone. sensitive guys fucking suck
So I just bought underwear that says "I'm taken." Just know that when I cheat on my bf with you, that's what I'm wearing
Stop making Mac and cheese and sit on his face. FINISH HIM
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So I saw her today...and it was weird...she is just like not pregnant anymore.
Dude...how high are you? of course she isnt pregnant anymore...thats what happens when you give birth
My mom just added me on Facebook... She has one like and it's Will Smith
Uh do you have my pants because I have yours
She's licking the vodka she spilled off the desk
Aaaaand now she's drinking it out of the shot glass like a cat
Highlight your past hook-ups. You've been stabbed, shot at, run over, and chased down the road...no you can't bring new bar bitch over here!
Dude she has a friend!!!!
He's hot, clean, can actually cook, and best of all isn't a narcissistic prick. I found a unicorn.
Ride that fucker.
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