Let's get naked and see who's stronger.
i wonder if she gts uncomfortable walkin bu when she knows we all know what her pussy tastes like
Thanks for feeding me more tequila shots to prevent me from trying to fight her last night. Horrible logic? Yes, but you are the best friend ever
If this herpes test comes back negative I'm asking out the doctor.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's only 11:30 and she's already making friends with the homeless...
I think our camping neighbours like us. We're the drunk girls trying to chop firewood with no pants on at 3 in the afternoon.
Omg, looked at my call history, and judging by the times of calls it took me like half hour to walk home frommcds
you asked my brother if you could eat the cupcake that you found. you were showing him a baked potato
And drunk me decided to play keep away with sober me's dignity
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
WAIT DID YOU MAIL ME A KITTEN
First stoner thought of the day: Life would be so much better if there were more things that were biscuits and gravy flavored.
You continued to run around saying "free the nipple" while "taste testing" every liquor on the premises.
I DONT WANT YOUR DICK. I WANT BRUNCH.
I don't care. We're going to fuck. And I WONT apologize in the morning. You cheated on me, so you can cheat on her with me.
So just spent 30 minutes of my life talking to my cousins friend who told me she buys cocaine from a pizza place by asking for extra Parmesan
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