maybe touching the ground while going 70 wasn't such a great idea after all..
Semi hypothetical question. Do you think its physically possible to bruise your clit?
i was about to cum until he started doing shrek impressions.
just remembered that i started a tab for just myself at 50 cent beer night last night... i dont understand my life
Yeah I hope so. Definately just saw two freshmen in very authentic togas and cotton ball beards. This new class is stepping it up.
Hooking up with him would mean my type has officially become... drug dealer.
I just tried to text you by typing "whoa" into my contacts.
The to do list extremely baked self wrote for me last night says "1. Join gym 2. Passport? 3. Join a gym" And then just a drawing of a squid
I promised myself in the hospital that I would give up drinking for however long the cast stayed on. Thank god it was only soft tissue and not a fracture.
I'll get you through man, I'll be your fairy godmother with better prescription drugs
Woke up to a sex noise notice under my door...he gets a A+ for proformance and ill be seeing him again.
Guess whose hungry like a hippo: this bitch.
Bro. I traded my coat. I have a Raiders coat now.
Get here now. There’s a guy dressed as Captain Morgan handing out miniature bottles of Captain Morgan.
I realize ur driving andwont read this til u stop, but I'm sleeping in the bed of the pickup. Please don't hit a deer.
Randomize
