i don't know how to normally transition into sexual activities without being drunk...
you think the cum will come out of moms black shirt?
...i had to draw her a diagram of her own vagina. including a little arrow to the clitoris. shouldn't it be the other way around?!?
I wish we were homeless so drinking on the streets was acceptable.
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Please do NOT set off the smoke alarm when I am tied to the bed like this...
And then as he was trying to conceal his boner from everybody, you said aloud "just grab your cock and get out of the pool"
Hm, finding a time when my drinking and your real life don't conflict could be difficult
What happens at the gay bar stays at the gay bar. Except that I sold my panties for $100. People should know that.
It's a journey
And the destination is his penis?
Precisely.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Can I bring some rope too? It's not too early for bondage talk, is it?
You peed up the stairs in front of everyone then blamed it on the dog
we're decorating our christmas cookies with birth control. so pretty.
I paid your brother in tostitos to drive me home.
Dressing as mugato from zoolander Halloween you may want to be the hand model. We can get you a fish bowl filled with Clementine Vodka and soda you can put your hand in.
Haha holy fuck. i dont remember much after pissing on your ex's flaming nude pics.
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