its whatevr the fuvk you could ever want is wht it is. i dont wanna read. literacy? overated in my opinion. overated.
i just woke up to 15 people singing a whole new world
On the brightside though, I found the motivation to clean my shower, it was right underneath my need to masturbate in said shower.
They both just did a shot, head butted each other, did another shot and then slapped each other in the face. These could be the two guys we've been looking for all our lives
Well it was 11am and we were walking to the market with red cups in our hands yelling NO JUDGEMENT at every car that passed
Pitchers of shots should be outlawed. I've puked more than i've breathed in the past half hour.
For a limited time only, free special muffin with the referral of a loyal dro customer! Have it for breakfast and be happy off your ass all day! Guaranteed! New member must buy at least an eighth. Oh and O's are on sale for 280.
You. Win. At. Life.
I am going to borrow your water/shock proof video camera for St. Pattys day so that if wake up next to the highway again I know why.
Ok but I hold the right to any footage of you getting slapped, puking, anything with body shots, and allowed to make a montage of it to put on youtube.
Twas the night before the bachelor party, and all thru the house...not a creature was stirring, not even a stripper?...
Is it weird that i want a guy to ask me to homecoming by spelling it out in meatballs?
THATS VERY WEIRD
i will not be out-irished. not this night. if i don't wake up tomorrow handcuffed to a hospital bed, i have failed my ancestors.
Oh my fucking god, I was conceived on the first date.
Okay first of all fuck you and everything you stand for because Taco Bell is amazing.
Thinking and hoping ice cream is the answer to my problems
Oral sex and brunch. The perfect sunday morning.
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