FYI..good luck when you get back from work.. mom and dad know about the boy you brought home last night
haha good one..how did you even know?
we all know. he obviously didn't leave when you might have told him to.. he came down when we were eating because he coud smell mom's cooking. the dude ate with us and offered to say grace. so yeah, good luck.
So, it's like build-a-bear for your vag?
a creepy fucking ass man came up and started raven cawwing in my ear... he said it was the raven mating call. i am officially freaked out
Does getting a boner while watching the celtic women sing opera on ETV make me cultured?
he was humming party in the usa while we were having sex.
It hit me after I slept with his best friends and brother, that maybe I took it a bit far
I really hope he dies in a tragic kegstand mishap
I know, but I was really high and I felt like a failure dragon because I could only blow smoke, no fire.
Lil wasted at a baby shower. Here's to beating teen pregnancy BOTTOMS UP
how did we start talking about space blow jobs?
The camera shows a viking with a white mask, a creepy green guy, a gorilla, and a pumpkin throwing eggs and laundry detergent in his yard
OHHH and there was a Batman too.
The worst that could happen is you end up with a black eye and I get laid.. I'm okay with my end of that bargain.
Romantically speaking, I want to sit on his face.
I can't have my last hookup before 21 have been behind a dumpster
I kind of just assumed by how he whisked eggs that he would be bad in bed.
I've never been so turned off by an omelet.
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