when I'm not with you everything just looks like crayon scribble
then he goes, "ok, i have to go talk to the girl i'm semi-talking to/dating and see if i'm in trouble" WHAT IS MY LIFE?!
You know how I told you I don't have many naked pics? Apparently that changed last night.
you just broke rule number 1. If you can't lift her up don't date her
I learned his name tonight. This now makes him a real person. Obviously, I no longer want to sleep with him.
I remember seeing LSAT prep books and thinking "Whose room is this? I should be hooking up with them instead."
I've got my laundry in the car, tonights 1 night stand pre-req is an in suite washer and dryer. Let's do this!
Nothing like a 3am firealarm to kick a booty call out...
I'm just planning on experiencing Disney as adult style as it gets. Drinking bloody mary's at dawn and telling all the kids waiting in lines how badly their future sucks and that Santa isn't real.
If you hook up with a kid and the next day he breaks up with his girlfriend, those can be seen as two completely unrelated incidents right?!
Found out last night that "Everclear" is Spanish for "shit got weird"...
I will never understand why the dress to get laid party is always scheduled to be during family weekend. Its not even ironically funny.
He let me keep my Michael Jordan Bulls jersey on during sex.
Yeah. I asked if there was a finger in my ass at some point or if I had a weird dream. So far he hasn't responded
i left you alone for two hours TWO HOURS & when i got back i had to rush you to the hospital because you were covered in Smooth Away pads & drinking the bong water..
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