What can I expect? While all of my friends are getting married, all of his friends are tripping on robitussin
I actually had to roll up my long sleeves to masturbate. I hate the winter
Avril Lavigne as a judge on Idol wearing devil ears. it's like every boner you ever had in 2002 just came true.
i just shit on the floor of my room. my roommate was in the bathroom, my choices were limited.
I made friends with a raccoon. I pet it. Like I was Pocahontas.
The google font looked peculiar last night, but then up close I realized it was just dry vomit.
you were exchanging tortilla chips with the guy at the next table, telling him your table was given the "big chips" because it was your 21st birthday
I just masturbated while eating dinner. Now who's the lazy one
My goal this weekend is to get a number that goes with the penis I take him.
Aspirations
So I just crossed my legs and I was like what is this lump on my leg? Oooh its my underwear from last time I wore these jeans...
I figured it out! The supermoon explains how I managed to have sex with 3 dudes in 3 nights without leaving the apartment.
Woke up with a $50 attached to my penis with a rubber band..
Sweet. Tell little Richard to buy us a sack and a pizza.
I'm gonna tell the medical examiner that your cause of death was over-arousal.
How does one take the "you're the best sex I've ever had but I'm marrying someone that's sub-par in the sack" mind fuck?
I pity the fool.
Thanks Mr T.
RUDE you're the one missing half a nipple...
IT HEALED AND GREW BACK TO BE A FULL HEALTHY NIPPLE OKAY
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