i kinda do this "flirt with girls and pretend to be a hot white guy named chris" thing
Chicken burrito, or no deal.
Is that code for my vagina?
Who the fuck has ever referred to a vagina as a chicken burrito
You flung your panties at that guy you liked with an accuracy that I have never seen before.
you can't get genital warts from dogs can you?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
That adds atleast one bjs worth of awkward sexual tension between us.
And she was like "I wanted you all for myself, to love you, and treat you like gold."... See this is why I shouldn't fuck Italian chicks...
she fell through a window trying to flash someone
I told her she can't come to our bonfire because she throws up on herself & she has a mustache. And now apparently I'm a bitch or something.
I just got woken up by some Christians who wanted to talk about the bible. ways to make a hangover even worse for a thousand trebek
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Aw don't be embarrassed. It was all good fun! We've all been there. You can't come to vegas and NOT get a little alcohol poisoning. That's like going to church and not praying.
Is "I am going to murder you if you keep sending me requests that I cannot fulfill" unprofesh?
Ohh I see how it works, eat pussy and I get Reese's pieces.
Oh, and one of the worst parts... his name was Mario. I fucked a Nintendo character.
Not many people can say they've been photo bombed by an antelope. I sure did.
Let’s try it, I’ve never had a bad time with sex, tacos and beer.
Randomize