I was up until 12:30 making that damned grammar test for my freshmen then I caught myself running through the verb tenses when I was giving him head.
"I have sucked, I will suck, I will have suck, I am sucking..." I've never felt more like a nerdier slut than last night.
sitting in room practicing taking shots. has my life come to this?
do you think the kids from 7th heaven are mad that dennis and sweet dee are their half-brother and sister?
There are Star Wars cutouts in his basement. Obi Wan Kenobe watched me give him a handjob.
I just cleaned your Jaeger vomit off my car with a knife. Don't ever say I don't love you.
woke up to the trail of sugar cubes leading to my bed........was i that uncooperative last night
im tired of her bring homeless men home when shes drunk. THEY ARE NOT FUCKING PETS!!!!
Ohhh. Its been awhile. Vending machine hotel condoms are $15 here who can afford to not get herpes?
i forgot to brush my teeth before I went over so i went to the bathroom and started eating his toothpaste. we're still in the early stages of fuckdom
I just masturbated and watched youtube makeup videos, which was just an extension of masturbation.
It's Friday the 13th and you just got boned by a guy named Jason....
I asked her how many times she came and she said "Oh god I can't count that high, Rutgers doesn't teach us that."
Just broke into the basement of my house via my american red cross blood donor card. I officially save lives
A world without bacon flavored condoms is not one I want to live in.
when i woke up w mysterious sticky crap in my hair, i assumed i had another blackout hookup. nope. turns out i made PBJ and proceeded to pass out in it. i ate the evidence when i woke up.
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