I bought a boat. Want to have sex on The Angry Clam? That's what I named it.
Its only 8 and she is already passed out
Perfect here is wht u do. Gently slip your index middle and ring finger into her butt hole but gently u dont wnt to wake her..let me know when ur ready for step 2
Hookers taste better with whip cream
Maybe we ought to get some pennicillin too
Fair enough
Can't wait to go see my drug dealers baby being born. He rolled all of the "it's a boy" cigars into blunts.
I swear my cock is like a magnet to my friends younger sisters mouths.
You know why I moved here? No public intoxication law. A cop just helped me from my bent over vomit pose, asked if I was ok, and gave me a ride home.
Dude. Remember the only two rules I set for that? Always have a sober friend and don't do drugs with a fat chick.
i'm exhausted. do you know how hard it is to put together an outfit that is professional enough to secure a babysitting job yet slutty enough to let him know i'm down for sex during naptime?
What time do you think you'll be heterosexual?
Your brother slept on my deck. There was a key under the mat. Relapse party success.
I just noticed that pic of your cock has a Christmas tree in the background. It's July.
Doing coke by yourself isn't as fun. Even when you're watching a James Franco movie.
so then the cop took one last hit off our blunt and then drove off in his car and we just all stood there thinking, yea... that just happened...
My face is going numb. I think it's time I call it quits
Was cussing out our DD when one of the strippers takes him backstage. WTF
They call him magic hands is all I know.
Somethings are best left a mystery
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