:( I'm sorry!!!
sexual favors sorry?
absolutely not
my mom walked in on my vaccuming.......i wasnt vaccumming
theres no point in washing my sheets anymore. its always going to be a fine layer of booze and semen.
i woke up to my roommate spraying cooking spray on my legs. fourth time this has happened. not cool.
My family is watching Intervention and taking notes. I need to leave NOW!
It got kind of awkward when her dad brought home a 20 something asian girl at 3am
I'm concerned you might be passed out on a random rooftop right now. Not concerned enough to do anything about it. Hope you're alive. Goodnight.
He ate me out while I was wearing a tiara.... I think I could get used to this
And, through a series of unfortunate events, I am at my grandmothers birthday party in a short dress and no underwear
I stood on the corner waiting to be picked up, dry heaving, and trying to block out the sun.
i just called my dad a bottom. he agreed
I just drove by a stop sign that had a used maxi pad stuck to it WHAT THE FUCK
Places I vomited today: hotel bathroom, in the cab to the airport, airport bathroom, airport terminal trashcan, plane seat 18E, and the plans bathroom
Fun wedding?
Yes. Very.
my friends roomated asked me this morning if we went to mcdonalds last night and i had no idea...that is until i checked my purse and found half a mcdouble in it...
I remember her making the first martini but the rest of the weekend is a blur of vodka, high heels and sex toys.
First time being used by a cougar. Definitely okay with it
Randomize
