can your parents tell?
i just had a cookie in one hand and a phone in the other and tried to eat my phone...they know
I can't cum and do my makeup at the same time.
im almost positive that in mid thrust she told me she was pro choice
hand shaped bruises on both boobs again....i wish i could say this is the first time.
no one is here. wer drinking in the beer garden in the dark and we stole a bucket of blue paint off the sidewalk. now her legs are blue.
what's the name of the guy at the bank you blew to get the lower interest rate?
um. wrong number, but good luck with your loan
You kept saying,"there's a seahorse in my stomach, who's trying escape". This was after the curtains attacked you.
I would feel bad sleeping with her unless all of her personalities were on board with it.
Saxophones in my mind. I swear someone dosed me.
I've already dropped her on the ground of a crowded bar dancing , been incoherent drunk to the point i couldn't speak and came within 2 seconds all on separate evenings so at this point she should know what I'm about
She was two things I dont understand: tall and Christian
Tell me again why we had to Facebook stalk your therapist?
He accepted my bet of 5 bucks to bike home completely naked. Never got asked about the 5 bucks, guess he enjoyed it too much
Dude I'm fucking tired of freshman, there are god damn teeth marks on my dick again
He is saved in her phone as Sir. Mindfuck <3/ vag cleaner of course I need to meet him.
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