Yup u can hook up with me now and not goto jail
ive never been so in love with another man before, in a totally none sexual way... no homo
also, i may or may not be wearing a cape right now. hint: i am.
My recently uploaded pictures to facebook: Me partying on Beale St. with a single girl on each arm. Ex's recently upload pictures: Several pictures of cats. I win.
Well, I guess this was as good a night as any to find out I don't know how to use my fire extinguisher.
Contrary to what I yelled at them last night, it turns out campus police CAN arrest people...
Well I woke up with a note on me reading Dear Passed Out Girl, and ending with why I shouldn't drink so much. Damn Tequilla.
im wtih 32a right now bc 34d is on her period. now i know how girls feel when their hookups go from magnums to regulars
Set off the fire alarm in our dorm at 2:30 am last night. 150 Naked people wrapped in towels shared a bag of popcorn with me as we watched the firefighters frantically search for my burnt popcorn in the building.
OMG THAT WAS YOU?!
They made the rule if I caught the ball with my cleavage they would drink the entire beer pong table. I don't think they expected me to actually do it.
Well for number 40 i would prefer to at least like the guy attached to the dick
had a dream that i inhaled my pet bird and started choking. Then I tried smoking from a bong and suddenly I smoked myself inside out. this is what happens when I don't smoke weed. my brain can't function!
Like the friend zone has no room for winks
I made it out of the house. Success.
It's not better out here. I'm at Target hyperventilating in the aisles.
In other news there's 12 shirtless Korean dudes all trying to jump on a tiny little trampoline so that's entertaining
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