Don't make out with my wife yet
would you ever date a girl who drove an 89 Chrysler LeBaron? - for the record it's a convertable
If there was a creeper hall of fame you and me would be the first two inductees
life is no where near the amusement park it was when I was on Vicodin.
is election day enough of a holiday to justify getting fucked up on a tuesday?
This is the first time I have ever hoped it's poison ivy on my cock
he might be the rich husband I pretend to love for the rest of my life!!!!
This may be hard to believe, but that wasn't the first time I was fingered under a snuggie
It's not
I wanna introduce you to my balls, Thunder and Lightning.
He almost got to me tonight but then I was like fuck it I'm going to dance with a teli-tubby on the bar so fuck you
but how can he casually chat with my father 8 hours after asking me if i'm a screamer
IF I CANT STRIP TO SANTA BABY THEN WHY EVEN HAVE CHRISTMAS.
I feel like any time there's that much rope, lingerie, and horse masks on the ground, it's safe to say it was a great night
..and by hang out i don't mean fucking then going back home i mean let's get something to eat & watch a movie and fuck sometime in between.
it’s my vagina i can do what i want to
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