i just got a Mexican deported. not sure how to feel.
and then he said that some chick told him he danced like an epileptic on crystal meth. he then proceeded to demonstrate this statement, which i can testify is 100% accurate.
The more I hate his personality, the more I love his penis.
In other news I saw a pack of make believe zombies walking down green st.
gotta love wednesdays
I need your advice and before you say it, no, it cannot be solved by a blow job
You clearly don't understand the power you wield with your mouth.
We took up a collection and paid her $50 to eat a piece of meat. Vegetarian morals trumped once again by cash.
He broke up with his gf yesterday so he could give me our annual Christmas sex at midnight.
Marry him. Now.
In honor of the internet blackout, I think everyone needs to change their Facebook pictures to ones of them being blacked out.
gladiator or hannah montana?
This is why I never have to ask who you are when I get a new phone.
The problem with that is that my car has been stolen
He came over drunk in a speedo i told him he has my vote he said who are you voting for when i said obama he took off running and shouting i was worthless like an empty beer can
..puke & rally mid art final. HAPPY CINCO DE MAYO!
I had a flashback of using my sock as a napkin after we got taco bell
May he have a McRib induced stroke and lose the feeling in his tastebuds.
His wife just cheated on him for the third time. I'm his first extra-marital fling, that makes it ok, right? You know to keep karma balanced in the universe
Your logic is flawless...
Randomize
