Is there a reason "Call me when you're legal" is written on my arm? I'm 22..
Could you please tell me why If you were a 21 year old man why you would want to sleep with a girl who has tinkerbell bedding?
i just got a UPS package from a name and address i dont know, with one of my thongs in it. no recollection.
he pointed at my clit and asked with a confused face, 'whats this thingy??"
Chicago was legit, ate some badass pizza and gave a cig to a crackhead..its all i thought it would be
When i tried to give you something that wasn't tequila...like water....you kept saying it was against your religion.
I've always been the spiritual type.
I think you blew it when you asked her "Do you look good naked too, Or is it just the bra?"
She just texted me that she's horny, then started quoted random music, then telling me everything she regrets. I don't think there's enough tequila in the world for me to deal with her...
Dude. The amount of love and appreciation from a house full of stoners when you come home at 4 am with donuts is overwhelming. The kind of love to make Jesus have to work a little harder at his unconditional love thing.
What's the address and code again...does anyone need anything and why is my viking helmet on the bed?
I'm serious-it was like trying to deep-throat a minivan.
First night of sleeping in the same bed, and she farted on me. I immediately excused myself and went home. Don't know if we're still together. Will update you.
Getting paid in weed to watch a pregnant adult with cooking skills is the TITS
Dude I love you. So much. Thank u. I'm safea. In allysi lns car. Mine towed. If u loved me ud leand me 500 in the morning. Sleep on it nd let me know.
I tried to fuck you in my bathroom while my parents were in the next room. I am a clusterfuck of fun.
Randomize
