If i come over, it means nothing
Skanksgiving break is awesome already... pilgrim and indian roleplay tonight.
you drank a bottle of vodka and then while throwing up in my toilet you kept reminding me our hs reunion was in 2 yrs and it was time to start getting thin again anyway
I Never golf you the sypdu of andrew. The one o will marry. The one j plwgded my last breath up. The one I pledged everything I live forbworh to. I love him more than life itself
WHY AREWNT YOU HERE SO MUCH FUN STUFF DO IT GET IN CAR NOW caps lock
Do you remember giving me altiods and wishing me good luck on the walk home?
Taco Bell drive through. Chick got out of the car in front of us and threw up on the hood of my car!
Not okay.
I think Vodka is my favorite. Everything else ties for second.
My nipple piercings are like the guardrails, that's why they feel so safe.
6 beers, 3 orange crushes, & half a fire ball later & you get my alter ego.
He brought me four big burritos and two joints! He can sleep with his bank teller any time he wants!
I think I have to break up with him. I just cried, not moaned, screamed, etc, cried, with tears of sadness and disappointment when I came.
I HAVENT HAD A NICE A NICE DICK SINCE FEBRUARY!! I WANNA KEEP THIS ONE!!!
i think i passed out for a few seconds while we were having sex but he didnt notice...
Autocorrect changes "sex" to "sec". I have been so long without it my phone thinks I made a mistake.
Randomize