put your butt on the phone this is a booty call
ron's 8" boning knife is for sale. oh and it comes with a flavor injector.
High?
hahahahaha turkey breast
bruce springsteen sings some of the most romantic songs i've ever heard.
the hells wrong with u
I just threw up, I'm either bulemic or pregnant, and I'm now accepting bets on which it is
I just stepped on my own foot and apologized to my shoe... THAT high.
Make good choices ;) This is your automated cockblock message
Now that my 6 day bender is behind me, I just realized I might have been the one who took a shit in our mailbox that past few days.
We just had to use a designated driver to get to night class.
Btw after this weekend the chipndales costume has a 125% success rate.
our relationship was basically a one night stand, with a three week long, morning after
I'm making a date with someone on Playstation Home. That's how my sex life is going right now.
Wait is this black Chris #1, cocaine Chris, or gay Chris?
No this is saxophone Chris
Well, I guess my plans of staying around the apartment and drinking my weight in boxed wine are ruined. I have a date tonight.
we should get together and get drunk.
On a Monday?
don't discriminate against mondays.
You kept apologizing to your car for talking behind its back
Randomize
