I've come to the conclusion that as a grad student I would much rather prefer to get laid then get drunk
I think you know full well that a few years ago my stance was the polar opposite
don't worry, i have a range rover and a brother hopped up on steroids.. we can solve this little misunderstanding quite easily.
I'm not even planning on drinking that much tonight.. but I'm writing "emergency contact number" and your number on my hand just in case
he screamed my twitter name while we were having sex.
I REALLY appreciate you guys taking care of me when im wasted but i think its weird when i wake up in different clothes than black out in
"reccomended dose" hasn't been in my vocabulary for quite some time.
His hospital is closing...I consider it "sorry you're losing your job" sex.
I'm telling you the guy came in bought a box of condoms and all three of the chicks that came in behind him followed him to his car. I want his life
i should do something illegal before my birthday. as of thursday im old enough to go to jail.
Three people drank on "never have I had sex in a tractor." Iowa at its best?
Sorry I dragged you across a parking lot
So that's all you want from me. Easy ass.
And an everlasting friendship
I knew it would be a shit show so I just went ahead and took plan b before I even got there. How's that for responsible?
Its a cash in stratch tickets to afford cigarettes and coffee kind of friday
i just got drunk and created an entire Dr Seuss unit for my first graders.
Randomize
