actually, I'm a sock model
fix you gags fore go to garrits please? !!!!!!!
What does that mean?
How when the cu k dos I yet u
Focus
Forget about socially acceptable. Make me happy instead
Reach down the front of your pants and feel around for a while. When you find your balls, leave the library and meet me at the bar.
I'm drunk at The Bachelor casting call in Cleveland
I cherish every text you send me
My idea of sleeping together involves doing the Humpty Hump. Her idea of sleeping together focused more on being fully clothed on the opposite sides of a king sized bed.
This is not a drunk text right now. This is an i want your dick text. There is a difference.
What the hell did I do to get youtube to recommend a video for me called "how to increase your chances of getting pregnant"?
dude wearing that thong all day was not worth the 7 bucks
First time on E and Chris took me to a petsmart during puppy day. I might die of pure awesomeness.
It's like he drunk calls 6 times for me to come over, but can't say hello at lunch.
I'm sorry I lead life with my vagina.
Just as an add on, don't expect me to wear matching bra and underwear. If I do, I'm probably drunk and it's your fucking birthday. Have a great night.
She’s fine. Found her in the bathtub eating Cheerios and watching Rugrats on an iPad.
Interlocking vagina powers go!!'
Oh god, your drunk again aren't you?
Randomize
