You blewit but ill be back in laekciew tonigthso calll mee
the pool opens at 11. by 1115 the ambulance had been called.
Do fat girls normaly have fat that look like a penis by their pussy?
What the hell did you do last night?!
you kept running around the room with a flask shouting "so much room for activities!" then someone tripped you and you passed out
woke up in a garbage bag. literally. it was used as a sleeping bag.
Either way, he made a blog for his cat.
i thought i'd fucked her to death. no lie. she just stopped moving.
She ate the cookie then went to the emergency room. Now her fam is pressing charges. Don't people understand you DON'T steal baked goods from potheads??
They left me stranded on the side of the road with a table and five gallons of water. They said it was all I really needed to survive. People are staring
It's just good to know that when I drink like a twenty year old I still act like one.
She offered to treat me to breakfast after a one night stand if I meet her parents and sex again if I act as her bf. It may be a trap but its a offer I won't refuse.
Who gives a hand job to a 19 yr old one night then the next lets a 31 year old random man fly a plane to town and pick u up and take u to dinner?
Blowing lines in the bathroom and trying to get into the mindset of someone who wants to be at work for 12 hours
I'm to childless and to single to be asking myself why I'm so sticky
I had to carry him up the hill while he was wearing nothing but knee high socks and a blue glitter sequin leotard.
Why is this not a picture message?
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