i'm sick of taking my pants off and seeing a look of disappointment on the girls face. i want her to be frigthened
Really stoned
just sent my roommate on a cheese run
I've been awake for 20+ hrs. What does that mean? I just realized if BSB were Twilight characters, Brian would be Jake and Howie would be Edward based on the video for "Everybody". That's unsettling.
It's unsettling that you took the time to think about that.
I just had the fat girl at the party come tell me I look sad and offer me a beer. I'm out.
so how much must it suck for him to know that the penis of his best man has been in his wife's mouth before?
Worst night here by far. And ive slipped in my own piss so thats saying something
Im about to embark on a date with someone who shit in my car. How did this become my life?
He titled his birthday party on facebook, "BJ's in PJ's- an adult slumber party." I'm the only one invited.
what's the appropriate greeting for someone whose bed you've had sex with someone else in?
I was cracking open beer cans, throwing them off the roof, and yelling "FRAG OUT!"
I just want to have beer shits in my own bathroom. Is that too much to ask for?
do you think our homemade porn will pass for my cinematography final?
My ex's new gf is pregnant and he is sterile, so 2016 is starting off well.
A condom just fell out of me. Happy Tuesday.
FYI there's a girl here with happy daddy written on her tits
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