people will do anything to get on MTV. like get pregnant.
I'm thinking of having one or both of my boobs out. They're small but they're mighty.
You ended at least 6 stories with "and that's why I don't snort coke anymore"
17 year olds will be the death of me.
obviously you don't know the college version of myself. if there's something i'm ALWAYS willing to put up for it's alcohol.
After grabbing my boob for a couple minutes he then decides to ask me if I was awake.
I woke up tied to the door handle with reindeer patterned socks. You can tell it's Christmas.
we fucked the fort apart but we'll rebuild it after we get some drinks.
I drank butter last night, who am I to judge?
Either I'm too drunk or she gave me a hand job to the rhythm of jingle bells.
after he went down on me he said he wanted an air freshener for his car scented like my vag. i cant even.
I had a really bad dream about us drinking this weekend. Remind me to tell you Friday when we start drinking
I've made out with more people in 2014 than I did the whole fall semester
I am never drinking with the goths again.
How to not get laid: tell him he reminds you of your brother. While having sex. Thanks, vodka.
Randomize
