When the moon hits your eye like a big pizza pie, you're a dumbass
I totally got off with my controler for my ps3. Soooo glad I ended up with that racing game for Christmas.
As a driver I hate pedestrians, and as a pedestrian I hate drivers, but no matter what the mode of transportation, I always hate cyclists.
how can i change my meal plan to a keystone plan?
I convinced a girl to do a shot of salsa someone fell through the whole on the porch and Sara swallowed a beer tab
So befoe we go on this mission how reliable are you for bailing peope out of jail
trying to imitate man vs food after 12 shots doesnt mean youll get laid
We were all drunk for the whole flight. Steve doesn't even remember the cab ride to the airport. At 6am. Says he "blacked back in" at security.
It's called the eyeliner-blowjob correlation, read a science book bro
We have a nice shopping list..vibrators and roller blades
Priorities
I knew he was a classy dude because when I told him my name was Jen he said "Gin? Like Gin & Juice?"
I mean I made my therapist laugh so hard she cried....so yes, my life is literally a joke to everyone
maybe i should limp back to therapy...
oh yeah will you also bring home vodka i wanna do shots on the roof
My neighbour just came round to ask why we posted a spatula through his door at 3am. What do I tell him??
Anytime you wish.we are doing double shots in the kitchen,and I drank a beer in the shower,so...the sooner you get here,the sooner you can get on our level.
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